The Senor Crabs division came to play in Week 3, taking down 15 of a possible 16 VP available, with 3 of the top 4 scores on the week, and a sweep of their match-ups. This success has created a real log jam in the division, with the 2nd highest scoring team in the league (by 3 points) being last in the division by 2 VP and currently sitting outside of a playoff spot…but it’s apparently the Snappers that have been unlucky with those 0 VP they have. Sure they’ve had the most points scored against them, but they’re also only 10 points from being the lowest scoring team in the league. Hard to cry about bad luck when that’s the case.
Week 3 also saw that start of WDJFS blowing up their squad, moving one of their most valuable pieces in Gronk after he took a donut on the week. The trade also ended up causing a tweak to the league rules/settings, as you’ll no longer be able to trade someone after their game has kicked off until that week ends. The system can’t handle submitting a lineup when a player that has already played is no longer on the roster, so we had to tighten that up for future purpose. As a result, Scotty gets a pass on any incomplete line up fines this week. He tried, and I tried as the commish, and it wouldn’t take anything.
Matchups
2-1 Endzone Dancers (198.44) – 1-2 Greg Schiano is an Idiot (145.90)
The Dancers slapped the Idiots around to get themselves back into the Taco Corp division race. Big games from Sims, Hilton and Fleener led the way, as they overcame an unusual stinker from Palmer and an early injury to Breeland. With the win, the Dancers are now only 2 points back of the Rexes as we head into another round of division games. The Idiots are back under .500 after a lousy performance from all but Winston, Elliott, and their LB. You have to think the computers won’t look favourably on this loss.
2-1 Chalupa Batman (194.84) – 2-1 Tom Selleck’s Moustache (183.05)
The Chalupas pick up their 2nd win of the season, shaving the Stache by an 11 point margin. The defence was clearly the difference here, as Smitty put up great offensive numbers and still lost the game, thanks to 6 of 9 Chalupa defenders putting up double digits, compared to one barely making 10 for the Stache. The Chalupas have definitely been the surprise team thus far in 2016, and can further their cause in a big way with a Week 4 win over the Nagintas. The Stache have to be disappointed losing this one, knowing they could still be sitting on top of the division if not for a shoddy defence. They had the top 2 scoring players overall…and lost. Let that sink in.
3-0 Loose Bandits (189.81) – 2-1 Rex in the City (174.08)
The Bandits rallied on Monday night with a pair of huge defensive performances to knock off the Rexes. The Bandits roll on to 3-0 and the number 1 spot overall in the EBFL despite another of their top WR putting up a lackluster performance. Julio Jones clearly wasn’t himself last night with only one grab in an offensive shootout in New Orleans. This trend is going to have to change for this squad to get over the hump. The Rexes only have themselves (as Jets homers) to blame, as the Fitz, Decker, Forte trio combined for a whopping 6.78 points in the loss. Had they started any other QB, it would be them riding high in the top spot. Will this be a turning point in the Rexes season as we now head into Bye weeks?
2-1 Fear Boners (195.90) – 0-3 Knuckle Ballers (176.13)
The Boners splooged all over the Ballers this week and picked up the max 4 VP in the process. Despite Cam Newton having a very pedestrian performance (mind you, Rexes would have been thrilled with 13 points at QB), the Boners got solid contributions at every position to take the victory and keep pace in the division. We will see what the Boners are really made of this week, as they face off against the league-leading Bandits. It wasn’t a terrible day for the Ballers, but it wasn’t a good day either as almost the entire WR corps was very underwhelming. They did manage to pick up 1 scoring VP at least but are still firmly entrenched on the Frittata Bowl radar.
1-2 Deadly Nagintas (245.23) – 0-3 Long Snappers (136.37)
The Nagintas put up the top score in the league this week, so they weren’t going to be denied their first win, this one against the Snappers. They had 6 players go over 20 points each, which totalled up would have been enough for this victory. Despite the Nagintas 5 scoring VP, and only being 3 points back of the total point lead, they currently find themselves outside of the current playoff picture. They have some work to do in the division to try and change that. This week it looked like the Snappers strategy was Zero RB and Zero WR, as only Allen Robinson did anything on the offensive side of the field. They also had an out of character stinker from what is usually a solid defense. Things don’t get any easier for them in division week with the highest scoring team in the Yobagoya up next.
3-0 San Juan Bananas (192.58) – 0-3 What Does John Fox Say (127.50)
The Bananas picked up the win, and one of the best players in the league from WDJFS this week, in a match up somewhat marred by the inability of MFL to handle lineup changes after a player already started has been moved. Not that it really would have mattered, as San Juan was taking this even with the lineup Scotty wanted to roll out. The Bananas now sit atop the division and have a rivalry game against the Idiots, while WDJFS is at the other end of the spectrum, sitting last in the league and likely headed back to the Frittata Bowl for the 2nd year in a row.
Week 3 Awards
Offensive Player of the Week
Marvin Jones (Tom Selleck’s Moustache) – Jones was huge for the Lions as they were in garbage time pretty much from the opening kickoff. He put up over 200 yards and a pair of scores as the top player on the week and is now the overall WR1.
Defensive Player of the Week
Deion Jones (Loose Bandits) – Jones was all over the field last night, and was the key reason the Bandits are still undefeated.
Rookie of the Week
Deion Jones (Loose Bandits) – Jones padded the stat sheet with 8 tackles, an assist, 2 pass defenses and returned a pick 90 yards for a score. Nice day rook.
Goat of the Week
Ryan Fitzpatrick (Rex in the City) – This may be an all-time stinker in EBFL history. Fitzsuckage threw 6 interceptions, one which was returned to the house.
Pickup of the Week
Corey James (Deadly Nagintas) – Oakland started rolling out some of their rookies on D this week, and James was a benefactor putting up double digit points in his first start.
Bench Player of the Week
Terrelle Pryor (What Does John Fox Say) – Scotty picks up the award again, this time with Pryor, who had a huge game in the OT loss to Miami. Pryor put up points as a receiver, runner, and QB in the loss.
Bonehead Coaching Move of the Week
Mike Bryce (Rex in the City) – Jets ‘homerism’ cost the Rexes huge this week.
Playoff Odds
- Loose Bandits (95.0%) —
- San Juan Bananas (86.9%) —
- Greg Schiano is an Idiot (86.2%)+1
- Deadly Nagintas (65.4%) +1
- Chalupa Batman (63.0%) +1
- Rex in the City (57.3%) -3
- Long Snappers (52.2%) —
- Tom Selleck’s Moustache (35.0%) +3
- Endzone Dancers (24.5%) -1
- Knuckle Ballers (20.9%) -1
- What Does John Fox Say (9.4%) -1
- Fear Boners (4.3%) —
The computers are officially drunk. The Boners, win, get max VP, are 1 VP out of the league lead, are 5th in overall points, and the computers still have them in last, with an even more reduced odds of making the playoffs, yet you have the Snappers, who have 0 VP, should be last in overall points, and their odds have improved. I may have to just blow away this section altogether, cuz I am just scratching my head over this one. I’m not understanding the 20% jump the Idiots got this week despite the loss either. They at least got the Rexes correct, down 3 spots after a rough week, although the team most likely to be able to catch them dropped as well. Someone needs to tell the computers someone from the Taco Corp has to make it. I guess if you add up those 4, it’s probably very close to 100% as they’re likely only getting one spot.
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